Hey, Stupid!
by Anonymous I keep hearing all these Bernie supporters crying and whining that they didn't get their way. "I don't like Trump, but I'm just not sure if I can vote for Hillary,""I'm actually...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Good Morning, News: Hillary Clinton Accepts, Sanders Fans Weep, and a New...
by Dirk VanderHart It was the good kind of history last night, as Hillary Clinton became the first woman in American history to accept a major party's presidential nomination. But damn it's tough...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Things To Do This Weekend!
Things to do for Jul 29-Jul 31 by Bobby Roberts Only one weekend left to go before July 2016 goes in the books, and considering what an ungodly shitshow the year continues to be, every weekend—and all...
View ArticleClik here to view.
“Do What You Do Best—Advising People on How to Pee on Each Other.” Here Are...
by Erik Henriksen via Jill2016.comRE: “Dan Savage on Jill Stein: Just No” [Blogtown, July 19], a transcript of the Savage Lovecast podcast in which Savage urged listeners not to vote for Green Party...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Enter the Mercury’s PETS IN ACTION Photo Contest!
by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey Do you have a pet? A pet that loves ACTION? How about a pet that pretends to love ACTION? Then enter your pooch, cat, ferret, fish, parrot, turtle, or whatever in the Mercury’s...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Here's What Powell's Has Planned for Harry Potter and the Cursed Child
by Erik Henriksen Every night I wake up screaming, my skin slicked with icy sweat. "WHAT THE FUCK," I scream, "HAS HARRY POTTER BEEN UP TO?" My windows rattle in their frames; the paint on my...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Sizzle Pie Is Expanding to Pizza-No-Man's-Land, New York City
by Ned Lannamann News broke this week that local pizza chain Sizzle Pie is bringing their pizza to New York City, a city with no recognizable gustatory tradition and a place that totally certainly...
View ArticleClik here to view.
This Week's Style Events
by Elizabeth Mollo Laptops and Smalltalk are holding a launch party to celebrate the start of their new venture, which is an online platform for emerging designers and fashion brands that educate and...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Bad Moms: Motherhood Through Bro-Colored Glasses
by Kjerstin Johnson In Bad Moms, Amy (Mila Kunis) is a working mother of two who, out of exhaustion, rejects the perfect-mom paradigm. She joins forces with single-mom Carla (Kathryn Hahn) and...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Meet Patty Wagon, the Portland Burger Week Car
by Bri Brey We dressed up a Mini Cooper like a cheeseburger for Portland Burger Week! Why? Don't you mean WHY NOT?!?!Meet Patty Wagon, Portland! #PattyWagon lives! Bri BreyIf you see us around town...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Timbers v. Sporting Kansas City Match Preview
by Abe Asher Peter G. Aiken-USA TODAY SportsFor the very first time since the beginning of the 2015 season, the Portland Timbers will start an MLS match with neither Nat Borchers nor Liam Ridgewell on...
View ArticleClik here to view.
There's Now a Whole Book About Your Nice Dad Tim Kaine
by Megan Burbank Tim Kaine: He's got the face of a man who would always give you a ride to the airport.Kevin Cupp via Wikimedia CommonsSara Benincasa, a comedian and author of a bunch of books...
View ArticleHow Hillary Was Shrunk
by Jen Graves Late last night, when the house finally fell quiet, I listened to Hillary Clinton's speech. In the middle of listening, my husband recommended we press pause on Hillary 2016 and switch...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Trump Says You Have to Vote for him Even if you Don't Like Him
by Matt Baume "Hey baby, you wanna be Chief Justice?"Debby Wong / Shutterstock.comYou know that quintessential '80s villain archetype who sidles up to a lady and thrusts his body against her and coos,...
View ArticleBroad City Celebrates Hillary (As Women from 1776)
by Wm.™ Steven Humphrey Last night's Democratic nominee acceptance speech by Hillary Clinton was definitely a historic moment for women and humanity—which is why Stephen Colbert asked the ladies of...
View ArticleWearing Sunglasses Inside
by Anonymous The fuck is wrong with you people? Unless you are in a sunglasses store or have a medical condition, there is no reason to wear them indoors. You don't look cool and we purposely ignore...
View ArticleThanks for Nothing
by Anonymous "Thrive"That's a pretty ironic mission statement seeing as it appears the entire your insurance company is helping me vastly decline in my downward spiral. I was sexually assaulted, it...
View ArticleI Won't Be Voting this November, and Here's Why
by Anonymous I had planned on voting for Trump this November, but my mind changed a few days ago...Underneath the shade of my "Don't Tread on Me" flag, my car sat parked. I had purchased two bumper...
View ArticleGotta Bring My Jams!
by Anonymous This rant isn't specifically for Portland, or Oregon but I'm so fucking sick of people that feel they must bring stereos to places like the beach, river etc. And then they turn it up for...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Woody Allen: From Auteur to Short-Order Breakfast Cook
by Ned Lannamann Woody Allen makes movies with the speed and precision of a short-order breakfast cook. Year after year, he churns out pancake after pancake for an undemanding diner crowd, with Café...
View Article