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You’re Wrong About That: Trump Supporters Edition

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by Francine Colman-Gutierrez

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Hi. I’m Francine Colman-Gutierrez. Here are some things Trump supporters are wrong about.


“Donald Trump will finally take away abortion”:
Wrong. I’ve got three abortions planned for next week.


“Trump will build a wall between us and Mexico”:
And if it’s like everything else he’s built, it’ll go out of business in six months.


“The Trump Administration has a mandate”:
Maybe you should Google the definition of “mandate.” Wait... let me show you how to use Google.


“Trump will enforce a Muslim registry”:
He’ll be too busy running “re-education camps” for reporters.


“Russia had nothing to do with Hillary losing the election”:
Fucking up democracy is literally the only thing Russians are good at.


“Trump doesn’t need daily intelligence briefings”:
Because he gets his briefings directly from the KGB?


“Trump can’t have ‘conflicts of interest’ because he’s the president”:
Tell that to the impeachment committee.


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