Should I get married to my transgender undocumented girlfriend before January 20? We live in Chicago and have been very happy in love and committed to each other for 2 years.
Sincerely,
Terrific Relationship Under Major Pressure
Your letter doesn't give me enough context to give you advice, TRUMP, excluding that you've been "very happy in love and committed to each other for 2 years." That's great, but... I'm thinking there's more to your story. Here's a letter I received right after yours:
My best friend of ~35 years is considering marrying his transgender undocumented girlfriend.
Though he feels passion/attraction for her, she is a regular drug abuser with an incredibly volatile personality who has put him through an emotional wringer over the last two years, claiming impossible acts of infidelity, forcing multiple breakups, and frequently making him miserable. He does not consider her his emotional equal, and in many ways sees their relationship as a self-improvement arc for her.
I want my friend to have love in his life, and I want to support him, but marriage to her is something I would advise him against in ANY political climate.
We have excellent communication, and he knows how I feel about her, but rather than discussing this very important decision with me has chosen to inform me by forwarding an email to you.
How do I avert this disaster?
Buddy Feelin''Fraid
TRUMP, it seems there are more ingredients to this midwestern hotdish of a situation than you first led me to believe. This isn't just a cheese and tater tot hotdish, TRUMP. This is some fatty, 7 layer bean dip thing that'll take days to digest. I'm fine with it, though, because this is delicious. I always say Savage Love is a discussion, but it's rare that I get two sides to a story. BFF, you definitely know more about this relationship than I do, but for some reason TRUMP wants the opinion of strange faggot in Seattle. So let's dig in.
BFF has doubts about your aforementioned happy and committed relationship, TRUMP, and these doubts are bringing up concerns for me, too. Maybe you really do believe your relationship is terrific and lovely and hot, TRUMP, but is your girlfriend on the same page? Are your friends? Is everyone in your life telling you you're delusional? If so, then don't listen to your heart (or dick), listen to all the voices telling you this is a DISASTER.
Let's review the list of grievances BFF has offered:
- she's a regular drug abuser
- incredibly volatile
- puts you through the emotional wringer
- "impossible acts" of infidelity (I'm not sure why, but something about this sounds kinda hot)
- you break up frequently
- you're in this to change her
Sure, BFF might be a dirty liar. "Regular drug abuser" could mean marijuana or it could mean meth. I don't know. But I do know that right after you submitted your letter to me, TRUMP, you forwarded it to your friend who isn't a fan of your relationship. That's some passive-aggressive shit that makes me question your judgment. So, get some friends together and pose the question to them. If they all learn towards a resounding NO, then don't marry this girl, TRUMP. Help her in any way you can, but if BFF's grievances are true, then it's time to start over. And while starting from scratch takes time and patience, it's better than eating leftover hotdish that should've been dumped a few days ago.
Listen to my podcast, the Savage Lovecast, at www.savagelovecast.com.